My sister is currently in the hospital for an examination, she has been short of breath more often lately. A few days ago we were together at Lake Constance. She wasn't feeling well then. But she's generally sick more often, so it's hard to tell if it's urgent or not. I'm glad that I urged her to go to the doctor. Often you need someone else to tell you what's good for you. It is often very difficult to judge yourself. We lack the necessary objectivity. And yet it would be good and important to be aware of your own warning symptoms and to take them seriously. Be it physical or mental. Sometimes we already suspect that it is too much for us. But we continue anyway. Like I did last week during the potato harvest of our solidarity-based agriculture-group. Together with five others, I stood on an old “vole” tractor from the 1960s and picked stones and soil from the conveyor belt so that only potatoes would end up in the collection container. Four hours in the morning sun, always leaning forward. It was fun, the people were nice. Sometimes the work went smoothly, then something went wrong with the machine and there was way too much dirt and we got stressed about sorting everything. After three hours I thought my body had had enough. But it was going so well and we were asked if we could finish the last two rows... And then we continued. And the sun got hotter and hotter. And the arms got heavier and heavier. A few hours later the bill came: 18 hours of severe headache. I should have known.
Sometimes we overestimate ourselves. We want to make it, just hold on a little longer. But there are limits we should not or cannot cross. Our strength is finite. We need breaks and rest. And there is no shame in that. But how difficult it often is to actually do that! It is not a problem for us if someone else needs a break or help. But you have to learn to ask for it yourself. Pride often gets in the way. Or shame. The pride: I can do it! The shame: Others can do it too! But everyone has their own weaknesses and limitations. I'm really not resilient in some things, but I'm really good in other things. I have to plan for that. And I can't compare myself. A duck is bad at climbing and a squirrel is bad at swimming. (Ok, I just googled: Squirrels can swim.) Anyway, everyone has areas where they need help and support. Or shouldn´t do at all. Field work is probably not for me. At least not for that long. I'm not as strong as I'd like to be. Most Tyrolean women are very athletic. I train on a different level. Even when I go hiking in the mountains. It doesn't help to try harder. I have to work with what I have. I can train my body, but I can't force it. And sometimes it's hard to know where the line is.
Perhaps it would help to stop for a moment and ask yourself why you want to continue. Do I want to prove it to anyone, including myself? Do I not want to disappoint anyone? Why is it so hard for us to admit weakness?
There is a Winnie the Pooh cartoon: "What was the bravest thing you ever said?" asked Piglet. "I need help," Pooh replied.
I want to learn to ask for help. And to stop before I can't take it anymore.
Sometimes we can help each other. But sometimes we have to recognize it for ourselves and ask for help.
When in doubt, we can always pray. When I ask Jesus what to do, I always get an answer somehow. It's just a question of getting involved and drawing the necessary conclusions. "I can't take it anymore" might be a courageous sentence for me. We don't always have to be strong.
He took our illnesses,
He carried our diseases.
Matthew 8:17
We´ve finally figured it out. Our lives get in step with God and all others by letting him set the pace,
not by proudly or anxiously trying to run the parade.
Romans 3:28 (MB)