This morning I read the story of Joseph interpreting Pharaoh's dream. But before he does, he says: "Not I, but God. God will set Pharaoh's mind at ease". (Genesis 41:16)
Joseph does not want to adorn himself with borrowed plumes. He knows that he can only pass on what God gives him in wisdom and insight. Only God can solve such mysteries. Pharaoh flattered him before, but Joseph did not accept the praise. It is not that Joseph was by nature humble and unassuming. He probably proudly wore the finest coat among the 12 brothers. He was his father's favourite son. That's why everyone was jealous of him. And when he began to dream and (proudly) said that the whole family would bow down before him, even his father rebuked him. Joseph was only 17 at the time. Although the prophecies were true, perhaps they went to his head? He was thrown into a well and laughed at by his brothers. Sold to slavers and taken to Egypt. And then innocently thrown into prison. These painful experiences must have made him more humble and mature. But still not desperate.
13 years later, he points to God. Only He can interpret dreams.
I wonder where I'm decorating myself with borrowed feathers. Do I sometimes rob God of his glory? The feathers belong to the Holy Spirit! (He is a pigeon, after all!) I don't want to be a warrior who steals feathers from the Holy Spirit! (Although I have just researched that the Native Americans only used golden eagle feathers found in the mountains for headdresses. That alone was a test of courage, but you also had to prove yourself in battle to be allowed to wear such feathers). So the phrase "adorn yourself with borrowed feathers" does not come from stealing another warrior's feathers, as I thought as a child... but from an old fable by Aesop: "The crow and the peacocks". A conceited crow, thinking he was better than the other crows, adorned himself with peacock feathers.
But when he joined the peacocks, they tore out his false feathers and chased him away. After that, even the other crows did not accept him into their circle. He was no longer even one of the crows. He had even lost its own identity.
Do I want to be better than I am? Sometimes I want to impress people. Then I want to appear clever and wise, well-read and eloquent. Funny and entertaining too, if possible. Especially with people I'm just getting to know. I want to win them over. First for God and his kingdom, but then maybe just for me? I want to be a light for Jesus and shine for him. But it doesn't have to be a spotlight.
My behaviour sometimes reminds me of children who act strangely when they are insecure and new.
I want to remind myself that there's no need to be afraid and stressed because I'm already accepted and safe! No peacocks or crows can chase me away. Even when I'm strutting around proudly again. Because I belong to Jesus and nothing can separate me from His love!
This security gives freedom and takes away stress and anxiety. I belong to Jesus. No matter how I behave. I can't be clever enough or too clever. Jesus loves me as a crow and even as a peacock in disguise. The more I can accept that, the sooner I can get rid of those silly peacock feathers. Because they're not very practical if they're not real. You can't fly with them.
I have a feeling that Jesus won't rip them out and won't scold me. But he's happy to wait for me to give him the fake feathers, and he's proud when I like being myself. Because that's how he made me, and that's good.
Sometimes I act stupid, but that's not the end of the world. And sometimes I'm clever, but that's no reason to brag either. If I am successful, it is really because of the work and timing of the Holy Spirit.
I don't want to adorn myself with borrowed feathers, but I want to be thankful.
I don't have to be perfect. Just holy.
I have been crucified with Christ. My ego is no longer central. It is no longer important that I appear righteous before you or have your good opinion, and I am no longer driven to impress God.
Christ lives in me. The life you see me living is not "mine", but it is lived by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.
Galatians 2:22 (MB)